Koopman Kraziness

 Someone once asked me how it felt to live life with PTSD.  I think this picture sums it up pretty well.  It feels lonely.  It's terrifying.  It's unpredictable.  You can go months without an episode and one little thing can happen that sends you into a downward spiral.  It never is "cured".  It never "goes away".  It's "controlled" or "noncontrolled".  I learned just how unpredictable it can be this week. I had spring break this week, which for me meant no work and no school.  I decided I'd spend some extra time with Kamden doing things he likes to do but we don't always get time to do, as well as that I'd do something for myself.   On Wednesday, I went to get my nails done.  It's always a time that I mentally escape, relax and just reset myself.  When I got there, the salon was fairly busy.  I had intentionally left my phone in the car so I could disconnect for a bit and had taken to reading magazines a...

I haven't written in a few months and I do apologize.  This year has been one of the busiest I ever remember having. Let's start with the biggest news.  Jeff and I have divorced.  While it was inevitable, it is still difficult and is something we are both dealing with day by day.  Trying to find your new "normal" after eight and a half years is challenging at best.  We had been separated a year when the divorce finalized, but that next step is quite the doozie. Nothing can prepare you for the floor of emotions.  You go into it thinking that you will feel relieved, maybe even excited, when things are final and the stress associated with the ending of it all is over.  Instead, you are faced with this ominous feeling of, "What do I do now?  Can I really support myself and my son?  It's been so long since I was single, what if I can't do it?" If nothing else, it has taught me that I can't do more than take life a day at a time.  I...